Split-second passion & “wasted” Saturday’s.

Today, I spent a full day at my kitchen table – drank 4 cups of tea and 2.5L of water – and procrastinated majority of all of my (stress-inducing) homework by re-writing ‘to-do’ lists and creating a 2nd-half-of-the-semester-calendar-of-events (because organization is a drug or something like that). I watched a ton of Bachelor/Bachelorette interviews because what is it about reality TV?! And somehow this morphed towards Ted Talks (thank goodness) and writing 2496 words of a soon-to-be blog post while only writing 116 words of my paper due this week. Then, ultimately I found myself watching a documentary (recommended by my cousin) that gave me the overwhelming urge to log off all social media and throw everything including my phone away (a recurring feeling of mine and something I’d like to consider ‘split-second passion’. It’s this split-second passion – these moments of intense resonation with something, where you suddenly feel “all in”. And then it goes away or dissipates or whatever, as soon as the dust settles. You forget about it for a little while, and then you find something else that can pull you in only momentarily before you irreparably fall back, over and over again. I’m a real sucker for this. Or are we all?) So then somewhere before or after this, I told myself I wanted to be more intentional with my actions – more purposeful with my choices, my decisions, the small stuff, the big stuff, the people, my life, and so on. I wrote a list of questions that I don’t have any answers to but I promised I would at least try, try to start answering them over time. So I guess this made my afternoon nap and procrastination skills look silly in retrospect, but…

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