A Note On Wasted Time.

You’ve imagined running into an ex at least once. Right?

Probably a lot after the break up. And then you hit a lull – cause you’re good and all. You’ve moved on – whatever that means – so you’re not really spending your time thinking about that anymore.

Then sometimes, even when you’re still good, you think about it again. Probably because you haven’t thought about them in a while and more than anything you’re just a little bit curious as to how they’re doing and what running into them might look like.

Reality for me consisted of running into someone I was into for a summer after a semi-final counselling session two weeks ago. I left that office feeling whole, like I was in the last scene of a movie and my feet were picking up pace with the music I was listening to. I ran into him crossing the street. He had a hot dog in hand and was late for a movie. We talked for a minute or two, and then I kept walking, still feeling whole. It was a small, barely noticeable, somewhat ironic encounter.

Yesterday, I was speed-walking through downtown in my own world, once again characterized by whatever music I was listening to, and I looked up as I was crossing the street to see my ex’s best friend and his girlfriend smiling at a couple that was almost in front of me. A quick and startling glance revealed the couple was my ex and his new girlfriend. Honestly, I really wish I had stopped to say hello. But everything happened too quickly and my only instinct was to hide behind my umbrella, hope they didn’t call my name, and keep walking.

The point is, we (I) spend little or a lot of time imagining what 5 seconds might look like. As it turns out, those 5 seconds don’t look like much at all.

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