What to expect.


Let’s play a game of
How many Kleenex boxes
Can you go through
– In a day. 

A warm cloth will feel good on your eyes
In between
I promise. 

Did you know the fresh air could smell so good
– taste so good
– feel so good?

Have you ever felt this light before? 

Does it feel like the world shifted?
I mean, it did.
They call this feeling
D i s o r i e n t e d. 

Words like
L o n e l y.
R e s t l e s s.
L o n g i n g.
Probably apply too. 

Somedays I imagine there’s no word to describe
This feeling
I try to summarize it by saying –
What do you call it when
You don’t know what to do with your hands. 

Shawn Mendes.
Over and over.
A new favourite book
A good park.
Maybe you want to see your friends today.
Call your mom, remind her you’re alright.
Maybe it’s too much still
To stay out too late
Consider yourself in recovery
Your body needs it as much as your mind. 

It all looks different now, doesn’t it?
Some days,
The good becomes the best
You miss it terribly
Why did this happen and it should never have happened
And let’s undo it all
Press pause
Hit rewind
Let’s go back
To where it all began. 

Other days,
The bad stands out against any good you once imagined
It’s all you can see
You’re almost angry
Why did it take this long
Why am I still carrying the weight of everything
I already walked away from.

Both are valid.
Both are void of a certain percentage of reality. 


How many phases are there?
How many more days
Until I’m just “me” again? 

Well, we’re on the back and forth path.
Two steps forward
Three steps back. 

You’ll get tastes of yourself
Here and there
Like – this is what it feels like
To feel good. 

You’ll get there. 

A new normal.
New normal is good.
Friends are great.

It’s surprising how much you can do
While missing somebody else. 

Weird how you can hit a balance
Of feeling really great, on your own
With a little bit of lonely, tucked away. 

Yes, the decision makes sense now.
For today. 

This is where you’re supposed to be. 

Strange how it can all boil down to
A really fantastic memory. 

This is good, but weird
A hint of sad
But good. 


Some things,
Never quite totally go away. 

Never is a strong word
Let’s stick with –
For the foreseeable future. 

But you put a box of memories
Beneath your bed
Hanging on to a few
In your back pocket. 

And things are more than alright
Once again.
Most days, they’re really great
And how you got here
Has gotten blurry. 

It feels good here,
I promise.
I’ll help you get here,
I promise.
You’ll get here,
I promise. 

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